Gerry Tales

Bigger! Better! More Wit! Funnier! More-laughs-per-paragraph! Who wouldn’t want to read Gerrytales?! I hope and wish any of these descriptions were true about the new additions to the Gerrytales blog pages.  The truth is that only you the reader can make those claims. I’m just giving a test run for a potential author marketing campaign.  I was in New York this past weekend and I was reflecting back on being stuck first at LaGuardia Airport and then a hotel in Newark waiting out the Big Black Out of 2003. That’s another story I’ll have to post….I was just six people from the security screener in LaGuardia when the grid went down and from that bad stroke of luck, I found myself in a pink gypsy cab headed for Newark.

I landed up in hotel blessed with a working generator and at 4 a.m. I woke up and unable to get back to sleep, I turned on the television which was tuned to a channel that was broadcasting a half hour infomercial dedicated solely to penile enlargement.  At first I thought I was dreaming as I watched the earnest, bespectacled spokesman look into the camera and inquire, “Who wouldn’t want to be bigger?!”

Who indeed! As the infomercial continued, a series of increasingly enthusiastic testimonials from  wives, girlfriends, mistresses, athletes, senior citizens, big people, little people, even a clergyman and a rabbi, all who finished their pitches with the same refrain, “Who wouldn’t want to be bigger?!”  To even consider answering that question in the negative was sheer folly according to these television persuaders. At the end of the commercial, the entire group gathered together and in unison shouted the question together, “Who wouldn’t want to be bigger!? 

Of course, even though they demanded an answer, we all know the silent and brilliant truth!

If only my writing was able to focus that luminescence on my readers so that the answer was the same to: “Who wouldn’t want to read more of Gerry’s stories?!”  Hey, it’s something to shoot for!

I’ve added an additional section to the blog called Family Matters and I understand certain members of my family may openly refute these stories. I stand by my versions! Three additional chapters of The Lost Soul novel have been added along with new business stories.  I have also responded to all of you who were kind enough to comment on the stories…..I’ve just figured out how to properly respond, so you have to scroll down the comments page. 

Also, there is one anonymous responder who has questioned why their comments aren’t being posted, wondering if their audacious comments were being edited. Au contraire! (Which I believe means “that’s horseshit!” in French)  Contrary comments are welcome and embraced!  I’m not sure what the problem was and for a while, the entire blog.com universe disappeared. So please, be persistent and let me know if your comments are not being posted and give me a return email address to respond.

That’s all for now….I need to get back to work thinking of new variations on the Who wouldn’t Want To Be….theme: Who wouldn’t want to be a genius? Who wouldn’t want to be taller? Who wouldn’t want to have cojones of steel?  I think the marketing possibilities may be endless!